Tutorial: How to Paint the Fortress of Redemption

So you want to paint the beautiful Fortress of Redemption the "me" way?

Well here's how!

1) Whine for months until your mum buys you a Fortress of Redemption for Christmas.

2) Leave fortress in its box for approximately one year.

3) Remove from box and build, making sure you leave each section of the fortress disconnected.

4) Spray black.

5) Make half-hearted attempt to paint it starting with a dark grey drybrush.

5.5) Listen to the audio book of Wilbur Smith's excellent novel, Gold Mine.

6) Place the incomplete fortress on the top of your shelving unit so that it's almost impossible to reach.

7) Leave for two more years.


8) Hear that new rules are coming out for buildings and suddenly get inspired to finish fortress off.

9) Realise dark grey colour scheme is a terrible idea.

10) Gaze speculatively at cream-coloured scenery pieces, wondering how you can do it even better.

11) Respray fortress black.

12) Wet-brush fortress dark brown.

13) Keep clippers to hand in case of cat-attack.

14) Watch some TV.

15) Drybrush the fortress light brown, leaving dark brown in the crevices.

16) Lay out Epic Eldar army ready for a game then realise it's never going to happen and put them away.

17) Read Forge World book instead.

18) Dryer-brush the fortress mustard with a lighter touch this time.

19) Lay out dirty kitchen towel squares nearby in case bandage needed after cat-attack.

20) Play Cityfight game of 40k with Tau versus Imperial Guard.

21) Continue painting fortress when its your opponent's go, really-dry-brushing cream, focusing mainly on the upper areas.

22) Ignore death-stares of opponent.

23) Grin inanely at opponent while continuing painting.

24) Use fortress section to provide impromptu cover for a Leman Russ Battle Tank.

25) Pick out detail on Lascannons (Tin Bitz with Dwarf Bronze highlight).

26) Paint other details metal then ink black and drybrush metal for highlight.

27) Pretend you don't notice Sentinel sneaking past.

28) Paint floors in metal.

29) Give black ink wash.

30) Use patented "swirly drybrush" method to highlight centre of each square with metal again.

31) Remark to anyone listening how ass-kickingly good you think it's going to look when finished.

32) Paint missiles dark then lighter red. Pick out tips in light grey and then white.

33) Try to think of witty simile for the way the missiles look.

34) Give up.

35) Do same metal, black ink, metal drybrush trick on other details and pick out skulls in cream and white.

35.5) Wonder why GW put skulls on every single scenery piece.

35.75) Wonder whose skulls they are.

35.8) Wonder if they want them back.

36) Lay out completed fortress.

37) Wonder if strange white shape in the background is headless man hunched over while trying to pick up a dry-roasted peanut that has fallen on the floor.

38) Flee from headless peanut-eating man while continuing to take pictures of fricking amazingly painted fortress.

39) Make deal with headless man that he can go back to looking for peanuts as long as he'll let you take photos of the damn fortress!

40) Realise you haven't actually finished after all because the Lascannon glowy bit hasn't been done.

41) Paint glowy bits turquoise and then light blue to simulate "glowiness."

42) Paint missile bay cover to match Crimson Blades insignia, always sticking to two or three tone painting method.

43) Realise it needs a bit more work.

44) Don't bother to do extra work.

45) Arrange tanks next to fortress in "cool" configuration.

46) Look smug.

47) Continue to look smug.

48) Write blog post, basically so that you can tell the world how smug you feel.

To Cut Off The Head: Part Two - Unexpected Friends

Grey Knights & Sisters of Battle vs Valorax Guard & Crimson Blades | Tim v Gill | 40k | 64 | 109.997.M41 

Whatever happened now, it didn't matter. The war was lost.

Ivan Chord, planetary governor, hero of the Manticore War, was dead. Assassinated.

And all Able Standent knew - trooper first class of fourth squad, eight company of the standing Qualitat Defence Force of the Valorax Guard - was that even if his life and the lives of everyone he knew were soon to end; he would die fighting for retribution. Fighting for revenge! 

His squad had been posted in defence of the governor's headquarters when the attack hit and he and all his battle brothers had failed in their duty, fighting off the attacking Adeptus Sororitas and Grey Knights.

As he and his squad took up firing positions in one of the still smoking ruins, Able saw where their enemy were headed: a pair of empty landing pads. Their assassination mission accomplished, the Sisters of Battle had swiftly withdrawn. They were trying to get out of the city before the full force of the Valorax Guard could mobilise and trap them!

They were already in the square below the landing pads!

A column of Leman Russ Battle Tanks rolled down the street beside Abel's position as he blasted the power armoured women with his lasgun, hoping for a lucky strike, but their armour was too good, the cover provided by the ruins too complete.

There was no way to catch them before they escaped!

"Bringer of death," he whispered to his weapon as he blasted away, "speak your name, for you are my life and the foe's death."

Then from the sky came a sound of falling doom and something struck the upper landing pad like a missile.

Able thought it was the enemy retrieval boat... then he saw it crack open and his prayers to the beneficient Emperor were answered. From the smoking drop pod strode the Crimson Blades, already letting fly with bolter shells into the square below and immediately tearing apart the Adeptus Sororitas as they scrambled into cover.

The square was a shooting gallery. The Sisters were trapped. And before they could find a defensive base from the pincer they found themselves in, a second Drop pod came down on the other landing pad, blocking their escape completely.

The Valorax Guardsmen cheered and Able cheered with them. The planetary governor was lost but now the Space Marines were here, fighting alongside them against the greater Imperium. As a line trooper, Able scarce understood the ramifications of this but he knew something momentous had happened.

He knew these new allies made every difference.

But he had no time to savour this change.

The air split and tore in the ruins before them and through the gap in reality strode a towering construct Able had no name for. He saw the silver armoured Terminator strapped to the front of it and saw the weapons turn their way and suddenly knew that this new alliance would mean nothing to him if he were dead.

Morale squads through out massive amounts of fire at the Grey Knights as they appeared, as did the infantry, but as squad after squad of the elite warriors materialised their weapons fire started to falter.

With only two squads of Crimson Blades to help them, surely their was no way to defeat this new enemy!

Then Damien Gord, gigantic company captain of the Crimson Blades appeared in a snapping of reality down in the square beside the Sisters of Battle and let fire his storm bolters.The Sisters of Battle were fleeing for the bunkers next to the landing pads but the crossfire was wiping them out.

The mighty Throne of Judgement fell,m trapping Inquisitor Lord Karamazov beneath it.

And still Abel fired, dropping to his knees, pausing only long enough to rip out his lasgun's steaming power pack and reload.

All around him his squad was dying from storm bolter fire. The Grey Knights strode through the rubble, moving away from the Crimson Blades, out of their range. The Adeptus Sororitas were lost. Able was sure of that. From his position it looked like only a couple of the women still survived; but the Grey Knights were undeterred by this. They calmly hosed down the Valorax Guardsmen, consolidating their position so that they could strike back at the Crimson Blades from a position of strength.

Rocket blasts thundered overhead and Able saw a boxey landing craft blot out the sky as it swooped across the ruins. It was a Stormraven Gunship! More Grey Knights and a Dreadnought!

The magnetic docking clamp at the back released the Dreadnought in mid-swoop and it crashed into the building next to Able's where his commanding officer bellowed into his vox, directing the losing combat.

The Crimson Blades were increasingly cut off from where the battle was moving. They had defeated the Sisters of Battle but they were in no position to redeploy closer to the Grey Knights.

Able could see where this was going.

He muttered the litany of protection. "Mighty Emperor, spread Your divine light to protect me from the darkness."

Grey Knight Terminators ripped the command squad apart as the Dreadnought tore open the armour of the Battle Tanks. The Stormraven slowed and hovered, preparing to disgorge its final cargo.

Then Grey Knight Purifiers fell from its open doors, firing their incinerators into the few remaining guardsmen before them.

Able clambered down from the upper level of his ruins and ran to help but he wasn't fast enough. As the Dreadnought crashed through the remaining tanks, the Purifiers hacked his remaining battle brothers apart.

In a moment of divine panic, Able Standent realised he was the last remaining guardsmen of his company alive.

And he realised that almost four hundred yards separated him from the Crimson Blades who might otherwise have saved him.

Then the Purifiers turned their humming falchion blades on him as well and sliced his flesh and bones to pulp.

With Ivan Chord dead and the Crimson Blades laying their gauntlets in the Valorax camp, the entire planet-wide theatre of battle had shifted immensley.

But all it did was point to an escalating conflict growing further and further out of control!

Scenery Workshop: Landing Pad

Take a look at my latest 40k building!

Now let's get a bit of ancient history.

Many many years ago, when building terrain for Mordheim was my overriding passion and my son, wife and I spent all our time doing it, I got a hairbrained idea to build a mayor's house that way raised up on my pillars. It was going to have a balcony all round it and a thatched roof.

I built the platform and started on the house, but needless to say, the house remained unfinished. The teddy bear fur I was using for the thatch looked terrible and the hosue itself was too squat. I lost the impetous and left the project unfinished for about ten years.

Until this weekend just gone that is.

I got it down from the shelf because I'd got me an idea.

I'd been using the piece all these years in games but it never made much sense to me - there's not even a way to get up to the top. But I figured I could build onto it without damaging the original structure and bring it to life in a more realistic and useful way that I could use in games of 40k and Necropolis.

Using foamboard, I build flat upper surface to go over the platform and scored squares into it. Then using parts from an old wooden dish drainer I added a skirt that would disguise the top edge of the original platform.

I'd made a helipad years ago out of foamboard circles. I never used it and this seemed the ideal time to get it back into circulation. Raised up on a little box my wife gave me, it would look cool and the differing heights would make the piece look more interesting.

But how were characters to get to the top? A ladder would preclude taking any luggage or equipment so a lift seemed the way to go. I built one from foamboard, adding cardboard stips for a bit of sci-fi detailing and some 40k building doors top and bottom. The base of the lift is an extension to the original footprint that I kept in line to make sure it would still work in my town. Again, with a ramp going from the lift to the landing pad I felt the walkway would add another level of visual appeal.

Et voila!

It's unpainted obviously but when it's done I think it may just look quietly cool.